I love art, make comics, anime of course, love zelda and video games, love anything with technology. Not a freak though. I wish to make animations someday. I love the color blue, green, and yellow. I love tacos and i am very fast. Any Questions? [(+_=)]
Age 26, Male
wat
what do you think?????
Flying on a whale
Joined on 2/12/13
This is nothing like the original. You didn't "rewrite" it, you simply deleted what you thought was unworthy and wrote something completely new and different.
About the text itself: it's very short, can't say much, you got the atmosphere & characters right, they all feel very natural, the situation is very natural. Very solid beginning for a story. Great job on this one.
Yeah, you're right. I should have just said it's a story that the reader can actually make sense to. Not to be confused as hell thanks to my lack of mystery story. The story is longer, and i'll try my best to keep this into sense.
beerbird
I'll just sit tight and wait for the rest of the story. On side note i do believe you are following me(Whatever folks call it).
3DPitDudez
Yes, quite. It will be done soon.